Streets of Fire is a self-styled Rock-and-Roll Fable. Set in a time and place reminiscent of grungy downtown Detroit in the middle of the 1950s, but featuring neon lights, color televisions, and 80s-style music videos. Supervixen rocker and hometown kid-done-good Ellen Aim puts on a concert in front of a bunch of frenzied fans, including gang leader Raven Shattock and his bunch of thugs known as the Bombers.
Raven instantly falls in lust with our lovely Milli Vanilli-wannabe chick. So, Raven and his Bombers choose the perfect time to kidnap her which happens to be as soon as the song ends. In the ensuing chaos, the Bombers assault the backup band, kidnap Ellen and throw her onto a motorcycle while police cruisers inexplicably launch into parked cars, and women’s tops tear off their bodies. Isn’t that what’s supposed to happen in a Rock-and-Roll Fable?
Somewhere in the world, the uber-mench Tom Cody receives an urgent telegram. Cody shows up that night on a train because obviously time doesn’t exist in a Rock-and-Roll Fable. Cody visits the diner where his sister hasn’t seen him for years. While there, the leader of a gang of pussy Roadmasters immediately challenges Cody to a butterfly knife opening contest. Cody wins, and slaps the loser’s face six times. He then tosses the rest of the gang through plate-glass windows, and steals their stolen car.
Ellen’s color-blind and style-challenged business manager/boyfriend, Billy Fish, hires Cody to kidnap back Ellen back from the dastardly clutches of Raven and his Bombers. No telling how long before Raven will remove his fireproof romper in front of the defenseless Ellen.
Everyone and their dog knows that Cody and Ellen were hot and heavy back in the day, but of course, Cody could care less about the super-hot Diane Lane. There’s obviously no sexual tension that sparks upon them meeting up again.
Before setting out, Cody stumbles upon the butched out and totally badass ex-soldier, McCoy at a bar. She isn’t Cody’s type, so we are assured of some witty sexual banter that won’t go anywhere, but ultimately if McCoy can handle Cody’s gun, she can tag along.
Under cover of night, Cody, McCoy and Billy travel to The Battery in a stolen car full of guns. There, the Bombers put on a display of fine iron horsemanship on their decked out 50s-style Harleys. While inside Torchy’s bar, Jennifer Beals’ Flashdance body double treats us to a striptease on the bar. While all eyes are watching the topless dancer’s well choreographed feet, McCoy slips in, and holds Raven and a roomful of his badass biker gangsters at bay…with a single revolver.
Meanwhile outside, Cody shoots holes in the Bombers’ bikes so many times, you’d think you saw the same one explode three or four different times in the same sequence! Cody breaks into Torchy’s, rescues Ellen, and then somehow in all the chaos, hooks up with McCoy. With Ellen in tow, they all run out of the place; guns ablaze. They then speed off down the middle of a one-way alley in their bright-red, stolen convertible while heavily-armed Bombers surround them, and threaten their lives. No word yet on if our body-double babe flash-danced her tight tail out of there.
Our heroes drive into the darkness only to ditch the cherry red hot rod. They stop a broken down bus full of unemployed black doo-wop singers named the Shirelles. While treating everyone to their lip-syncing wondery, our hapless clan runs into the most inept police roadblock since the Keystone Cops. So while Cody blows holes in their Studebakers, McCoy drives the bus through the flaming CARnage to freedom.
Once back in downtown Detroit, even a torrential downpour can’t put out the white-hot flame the burns between Cody and Ellen. So the two swap spit in a cozy bed while Billy impatiently waits outside with Cody’s $10,000 for services rendered (which service is left to your imagination). Once all their midnight oil burns out, our heroes realize they are in over their heads.
Since you can’t call the Ghostbusters in this fable, they enlist the help of two, count’em, TWO Detroit cops. To sum up, that’s two Detroit cops, one ridiculously-sexy Cody, and a Strange Brew brother against Raven and 100 of his Bombers packing Winchesters on motorcycles. Whoops.
Thankfully for our heroes, this is a Rock-and-Roll Fable, so instead of torching Detroit and causing all kinds of hell because their own bar is in ruins, the Bombers choose the more intelligent path. They decide so send their 5ft-8in leader Raven to face off mano a mano against the 6’2” studmuffin with a lot of lovin, Cody, in a sledgehammer battle to the death. Universal Pictures might have sold you the whole seat, but you’re only going to need the edge.
After a quickie battle, Cody defeats Raven, who doesn’t put up much of a whimper, and then his boys drag him away without a fight of their own. Cody then leaves town all Casablanca-like without the girl. He walks away, and gets into the cherry red hot rod with his new partner in crime, McCoy. Billy Fish gets Ellen. Ellen gets a music career, and we get the end.